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by Nicole Danielle
In each of our regular podcast episodes for Romance on the Rocks, we give our books a Spicy Scoville Scale rating. Over the course of Season 1 of the podcast, we realized we need to expand our spiciness levels. Some books, like Debbie Macomber‘s 1225 Christmas Tree Lane from Season 1 Episode 5 — A Christmas for the Dogs, had to be ranked at completely devoid of all spice.
Enter the new “Milk” level which is what some people use to cut the heat when eating hot peppers. And I originally advocated for a “Green Pepper” tier which Meghan previously thought was unnecessary. She believed we would be fine to start at “Poblano.” But thanks to Mrs. Macomber and quite a few of our Season 1 books, we agreed it was time to put Green Pepper on the scale. “Carolina Reaper” still remains at the top of the chart.
Why We Have a Spicy Scoville Scale
The reason we rank our romance novels in our podcast is to help our fellow hopeless romantics and bookish biddies when choosing what romance novels to read. Do you like your books dark & steamy? Then you’ll probably want to choose books that start at jalapeno or habanero. Do you prefer something a little more demure and tame with low heat and sweetness? Then stick to the books we rank between milk and poblano. Here’s our updated chart that we used for Season 2 and will continue using for Season 3.
The New Spicy Scoville Rankings
So here’s how we are now ranking the books.
- Milk: Sweet, innocent romance. Near miss kisses or chaste kisses. Innocent romantic thoughts of only love. Zero mention of certain anatomical bits.
- Green Pepper: Sweet romance with perhaps a kiss here or there and strong stirrings of love in the heart. Perhaps some cheek flushing and dreaming of a touch. Perhaps a moment of standing close together and feeling each other’s warm breath.
- Poblano: We may see some stirrings of love in the heart … and the loins. We may read about heaving chests and bosoms, and characters may have a make-out session.
- Jalapeno: There may be mention of intimate encounters but without the full descriptions or details of the act. Sex scenes are glossed over or closed door but we know the characters are doin’ it. Characters might engage in making out and heavy petting with some details on those moments.
- Habanero: As Meghan explains in our Introductory Episode, habanero is when “you’re really gettin’ in there.” We’re getting hot, spicy details and lots of descriptions of intimate scenes and sexual encounters.
- Carolina Reaper: Carolina Reaper blows out the top of our chart. “It’ll leave you dead,” as Meghan says. A novel at that rating is going to be heavily detailed and extremely graphic in details. It may even fall into the dark romance or erotica category but not always. There may be some descriptions or scenes that are too hot to handle for the average romance reader.
And Pepper Spray
And it’s not on our official Scoville Scale but my husband, Bob, came up with an accessory to the scale: pepper spray. For our podcast, we love to bust out the pepper spray when a character in a book is being completely inappropriate and/or for situations where there is something triggering like assault.
What We Each Prefer to Read
Most of our regular podcast listers know our personal preferences by now. I like my books spicy. So I much prefer books that at least start at the jalapeno level and I’m happiest at the habanero level. I like the details and descriptions and those steamy, hot moments between characters in a novel. Meghan likes things left to the imagination while I prefer it all spelled out. Meghan likes at least some show of emotions and intimacy, though, so she likes books in the poblano to jalapeno range. She loves a slow burn and I want instant heat.
Do you have a spiciness level you prefer for your romantic reads? What’s the spiciest book you’ve ever read? Have you read romance literature that is less than spicy? Let us know in the comments below!
